Dear reader, if you did not know me in my 20s, consider yourself warned, I was a mess! JR was a conquest. He was like the 3rd in charge of the QFC we worked together at. So he was technically my superior so us dating was a bit of a scandal. Folks “knew” we were together but didn’t know(wink, wink). I can’t even say I was really attracted to him, more that we weren’t each other's type and wanted to see if I could pull him. He was a few years older than me, and he had the most baby of baby faces. We are talkin peach fuzz, rosy cheeks. The man was a cherub. And a Republican.
He grew up very conservative and to be honest I can’t even remember how our flirtation really started and evolved. I’m sure I initiated and was probably overt because that was my style. I worked in the Starbucks at the time, so I was at the front end of the store which brought many flirtation opportunities and moments for us to connect and get close. We had absolutely nothing in common, I’m pretty sure my wild 20 year old self was just wanting a challenge. We were together for at least a year, maybe 2.
He treated me well. He took me to nice dinners and I am pretty sure I love yous were exchanged. He actually surprised me with his taste in music (huge Biggy fan)also was kind of just clueless about sex, but pretty decent for his sort of repressed upbringing and what seemed to be a naïveté he was self conscious about. I found that refreshing. He really seemed to struggle with how he presented versus who he really was inside, common with that sort of background, I suppose. I remember a lot of awkwardness and enthusiasm. Eager to please. Which made it fun at the time. I liked being in power, even being the younger one in this relationship.
He took me to Leavenworth. He got us a hotel room there for the night and bought Moet and Alize for us to drink. I remember feeling so grown up and fancy. He heard it in a Biggy song so thought it was cool. Come to think of it, maybe he was a rebound. I had a whole J phase where I dated a string of men with names that started with a J. There was one before this one that definitely broke me…another time, that one of maybe that one stays in the vaults…
I had short hair then, that exposed a tattoo of my astrological sign on the back of my neck(I know, I know). He didn’t want his mom to see my tattoo. And I remember feeling offended but then like realizing “ wait I’m not trying to marry this guy am I?” We broke up the night George W Bush got re-elected.
It’s funny the pieces of life that resurface into memory, I had honestly forgotten about him until last night when reminiscing about being called a “scandalous hoochie” with my forever partner in crime. Another story for another time.
This story is pretty tame but is definitely out of my comfort zone to share. Hoping it helps me move into juicier territory moving forward!
I’m so glad you shared this and that I am not the only one who completely forgets about people or scenarios until something prompts me to remember.